Invite better friends. Really. If they're not the sort that understands boating then spare both parties the agony and leave them out of your boating plans.
No smoking. Period. End of discussion. If they're that much of a junkie they can't hold their cravings until the end of the trip then they can stay the hell home. Besides, it's close enough quarters on the boat I don't want to smell their stinking breath. It's a filthy f***ing habit and I'll have none of it on my boat AT ALL. Yes, you could say I take a hard line about this.
I hear you regarding bring-alongs, whether it be food, guests or gear. I just make sure to have a conversation with them ahead of time on it. This after one friend brought a MONSTROUSLY large bowl of fruit salad. Now, it was really tasty and she meant well, but I don't think there are ANY lockers on that boat that'd have been big enough to hold it. Fortunately I keep a couple of boxes of ziploc baggies on board (it took like FOUR gallon bags).
I've not had someone be rude enough to bring along uninvited guests. I have had folks ask ahead of time. My usual response is to suggest we plan another trip at a later date because we already have enough passengers for this one. Frankly, there's nobody "that important" in our lives that would be that rude about this. At least not that we'd be inviting to the boat. This goes back to 'invite better friends'.
I made the mistake of making strawberry daquiris.. once. Damn pink stain is still barely detectable on the carpet. No artificially colored anything allowed now. It's better to just buy all the provisions ourselves. I usually present this as "I'm going shopping for food, do you want me to buy anything special for you? You can reimburse me later." Works great. The combination of being gracious enough to invite them out for a trip and offering to do the shopping seems to get them into the right frame of mind.
As for the toilet, it's a pointless battle. It's there, it's designed to be used, get over it. Granted, a tiny porta-potty is a lot more hassle than a built-in waste tank. When I had to deal with the smaller one I just let folks know it only held a small amount. As in, "we have one but, seriously, it really doesn't hold much. So BE SURE to avoid using it and let me know when you do." The same talk still applies and we have no trouble. It may seem like a 'rude' or 'uncomfortable' conversation but better that than deal with problems later.
Shoes and upholstery, same conversation. Talk ahead of time and help stow the shoes should they wear the wrong kind. Yeah, again, might seem rude but it's YOUR boat and they're GUESTS. It's all about balance and having a good time.
Most poles are pretty sturdy when the canvas or cover is properly installed on them. That and poles are undoubtedly cheaper than the cost of someone getting injured. Yeah, swinging like Tarzan from them is a bad thing, but using them to steady themselves shouldn't really be a problem.
|
Funny how selective I've become over the years as to who I'll invite. 